


Abandoned

by WritingWren



Series: Mother Hens of Marmora 'verse [4]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Again, Angst, But part of a series, Fluff, Lots of Angst, Mentions of past child abuse, One Shot, Past Child Abuse, and you might want to read the other parts before this if you haven't yet, daddy antok saves the day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-11
Updated: 2017-09-11
Packaged: 2018-12-26 13:34:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12060048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WritingWren/pseuds/WritingWren
Summary: The other paladins try to understand what a pack really is. They get it all wrong, Keith explains it to them. Then all the Blades of Marmora need to go on a mission and Keith needs to stay behind in case Volton is needed, and everything goes downhill from there.





	Abandoned

**Author's Note:**

> So this goes from funny and lighthearted to really, really dark and angsty and then Daddy Antok sweeps in to save the day. How did he ever become super dad? I don't know but I love him.
> 
> Part 4 of the Mother Hens of Marmora 'verse (already part 4. How do I write so much all of a sudden?)
> 
> You can thank paladin-pile for the MASSIVE angst, it was her idea to let them leave Keith behind~
> 
> (I couldn't reply to all those super nice comments bc I was busy writing this, but I will later! Just thank you all for your comments, and the kudos, and everything! Thank you so much!)
> 
> Enjoy~

Hunk is carrying a box of new parts for Pidge when he sees it. There’s Keith, but it’s a different kind of Keith than he knows. The Keith he knows is all serious, not much older than Hunk himself but a lot more mature, at least that’s what Hunk thinks. Sometimes he forgets that Keith is 18 and not 25 like Shiro or even older. Sure, the other paladin has been opening up somewhat, and sometimes his age shines through, but he’s still so much in control of his emotions, apart from his, ah, anger problem… So what Hunk sees right now almost makes him drop his box. There’s Keith and Thace; the Galra ruffles Keith’s hair and instead of killing him, like Hunk was sure he would if _anybody ever_ did that, he just swats the hand away with a fond exasperation that is very telling of how often this happens. Keith says something and Thace smiles sheepishly, and that’s when Hunk decides it’s a Privat Moment TM and that it’s best to make himself scarce before they notice him.

*

Pidge has had a good day, tinkering away on the lions. She’s updated all of them with Hunk’s help in the last few days, Lance’s having been the last, and now she’s on her way to tell him she’s done and how it’s gonna work, when she sees it. _It_ being Keith and Ulaz, which wouldn’t be anything unusual; no, it’s what they’re doing. It’s the Galra _nuzzling his hair_ or maybe he’s kissing it, she doesn’t know, but it’s more than just a little weird anyway. And, to top it all off, Keith doesn’t seem to have any problem with it. At all. For a second there she thinks the Galra might be bad Galra after all, and that they exchanged Keith for a robot or something to infiltrate the castle and the team, but no, that’s just her imagination going wild. She’d have known if Keith was a robot. She can smell those; okay, not _smell_ them… but, robots are her sixth sense and she would’ve noticed if he was one. Shaking her head, she chooses to ignore it for now and goes to find Lance like she planned. Who knows what’s up with Keith anyway.

*

Lance loves hating Keith. Though they’re not hating each other at this point, but they’re still rivals. Archenemies. Because Keith is good at everything he does, seemingly effortless, and he’s good at everything Lance ever wanted to do, if he’s honest. _If_ he’s honest, Lance still isn’t sure what makes him special, and he doesn’t know why Blue even chose him -ohh he loves her, alright, more than anything, but sometimes he thinks the only reason he was chosen was because nobody else was around. Nobody else who didn’t belong to another lion already, at least, even though they didn’t exactly know that back then. But those are thoughts for when he’s on his own, for lonely nights when he misses his family, and this is not such a time. Right now he’s on his way to hang with Hunk and Pidge and they’re gonna have a great time, and they’re probably gonna be working on something technical and he’s probably going to just sit there, because he’s not much of a help with that kind of stuff, and that’s okay because he’s Lance McClain and he-

stops dead in his tracks when he sees it, his dreams coming true. There’s Keith and Antok, and this is too good to be true. The paladin is pulled against the Galra’s chest, saying something muffled; they’re having a whole, hushed conversation like that. Lance is totally going to make fun of that, but something holds him back. Because that whole scene is so _intimate_ , and Keith looks so much more fragile than usually, and Lance thinks if he made fun of this it might hurt the other paladin for real. And archenemies or not, the bickering is fun and all, but he doesn’t _really_ hate Keith anymore, and he doesn’t _really_ wanna hurt him, either. In that moment Keith pulls away suddenly and Lance hears him say,

“We can’t do that here,”

and huh, isn’t that weird. But he’s not going to make fun of it, so he’s not going to intrude, and he really doesn’t want to find out what will happen if Keith notices him here, so he leaves quietly, like the space Ninja he is. But he can’t let it go, either, so as soon as he’s with Hunk and Pidge he has to tell them.

“Guys, I just saw the most ridiculous thing _ever_.” And he tells them.

At which Pidge looks up from what she’s been doing. “Wait, you saw that, too?” and Hunk, almost spitting out what he’s been drinking, says, “Hold on, I’m not the only one who saw that Keith?”

Turns out something similar happened with other Galra.

“Huh,” says Lance. “Weird.”

*

Ever since his one-day-capture, the Galra have been much more affectionate with Keith, as if they’ve actually been scared to lose him and are just happy to have him back. It’s a bit of a problem, because it leads to the kind of affections that are usually for their room and pack time only kinda spilling over into the real life. It’s getting better already, though, and so far nobody seems to have noticed, so maybe Keith will get away with his dignity in tact. But nothing is ever that easy in his life; he should’ve known. One day he’s cornered by Hunk, Pidge and Lance and sat down on the couch of the common room without much of a choice.

“Guys?” he asks, “What’s going on here?”

“So we’re totally only doing this because we wanna look out for you, yeah?” Hunk replies, and it’s really more of a question than an answer.

Which doesn’t help much and, if anything, confuses Keith more. “What are you even _talking_ about?”

“What Hunk means,” Pidge chimes in, “is that we’re teammates, right? So we wanted to make sure, that, y’know…” She trails off, not knowing what to say for once.

“Lance,” Keith asks, slightly annoyed. “Can you _please_ just tell me what these two are trying to say or do I need to get a dictionary or something?”

Lance struggles a little before he blurts out, “IsItSexual?”

“You - _what_?”

“The Galra and you,” the blue paladin tries again, “is it, y’know, sexual or something? Because if it is that’s nothing bad, just-“

Keith doesn’t hear much more of Lance’s rambling after that. Him. And the pack. _Sexual_. Oh god. Oh god oh god oh god, oh no. How do they get that idea, did they see anything, but Keith was being _so careful_. And the mere thought of… of _that_ , with _them_ , or rather that anyone could think that, makes him want to jump right out of one of the windwos without his space suit on.

“NO!” he yells, much louder than he planned to. The others all flinch and Keith takes a deep breath and adds, calmer, “ _No_. Don’t even ever say that again. That’s just. Ew. No. We’re not even talking about if that could be a possiblity.”

“So… you’re not, then?” Hunk asks, and Keith glares at him this time.

“What about _no_ did you not understand?”

“Just making sure…” the yellow paladin mutters.

“How did you even _get_ that idea?”

“It’s, ah, y’know,” Lance scratches the back of his head. “We’ve seen… some things. Y’know. You. With them. And then there was that time where you were kinda… cuddling? With Antok. And you were, like, _we can_ _’_ _t do that here_ , and…”

“What, so you thought I was talking about… making out or some shit?”

None of them says a word, but Keith can see that this is exactly what they’ve been thinking. And how sick is that, but how should they know, not being Galra? Keith himself only really understands half of it by now. He needs to clear this up, now, before they take it to Shiro or something. They’ve talked about it before, in the beginning, after what Keith thinks of as the Red-Fever-Incident, but back then he’s been avoiding a lot of their questions, too, either because he didn’t know, or because he couldn’t or didn’t want to put it into words.

So he sighs and, this time honestly, tries to explain to them what a pack is, and what it does, and that it’s a dynamic mostly run on instincts and much more like a family than anything else (though he can’t know for sure, because he’s never had a family before). “And you guys probably don’t know,” he finishes, “but Galra get really old. We’re talking hundreds of years. The Blade of Marmora? They’re all around _two hundred_ and they’re considered young; so you might understand how they see me, with 18 years, since I’m half Galra, as a child -a kit. But they’re cool about it, and they know I’m half human, too, and that I’ve been taking care of myself for a long time now, so they don’t interfere too much in my duties or everyday life. And it’s alright; I like it, actually, so you don’t have to worry or something.” He shrugs. “The part of me that’s Galra needs a pack and they’re great, even though they can be real mother hens.” Keith can admit that, now, because he doesn’t think it’s something shameful anymore to let someone into his life, that close, and if that isn’t some serious improvement he doesn’t know what is.

“And I know they’ve been a bit overbearing since what happened on that outpost, but they’ll probably calm down soon, so you guys won’t see any more of that, either.”

“Wait,” Pidge says. “Did you just say-“

“ _Two hundred years_?!” Lance and Hunk finish simultaneously.

It might take a while until they’ve assimilated that little piece of information, but Keith can’t really help them with that. It’s not that important to him anyway, so he just shrugs and nods. There’s a moment of silent, then another one, until Pidge has recovered enough to find something else to latch onto.

“So,” she says, looking smug at her own wit, “does that make you Shrödinger’s kit?”

“Ohhh I get it,” Hunk replies. “Because he’s a kit and not a kit at the same time, right?”

“Yep! And don’t the Blade of Marmora use BoM as an abbreviation in documents sometimes? So if they’re mother hens, does that make them…” she pauses dramatically. “Keith’s MoMs?”

By now Lance is laughing so hard that he has tears in his eyes, doubling over, and Keith sighs in annoyance. It’s not the bad kind of annoyance, though, so he lets it go. He figures they were going to do that or something similar at some point, and at least they’ve stopped with the whole sexual-thing. And maybe he doesn’t mind that much because they’re being cool about the pack.

“Very funny,” he still says, dryly, because he’s never going to show them just how relieved he is that they’re taking it in stride and are only making a few harmless jokes about it.

A little while later, once they’ve all calmed down again, Hunk puts a hand on Keith’s shoulder. “Seriously though, you don’t have to hide it if they’re, like, your family and you’re being affectionate with them. That’s kinda what families do, y’know?” The others nod along. Which, wow, is really nice of them, but won’t change Keith’s mind about keeping as much of the pack things as he can behind closed doors. Though it’s nice to know that he’s still being accepted even though they’ve seen him being coddled a little.

“I wonder what my mum’s doing,” Pidge says all of a sudden -though not that sudden, since they’ve been talking about family. “I hope she’s alright… I mean, she lost dad, and Matt, and now I’m gone, too…” And just like that the lighthearted atmosphere is gone.

“Yeah…” Hunk looks down. “I wonder what my parents are up to… and my brothers… and cousins…”

“Same,” Lance replies, much more quiet than before. “What do you think they think happened to us? I mean, we just disappeared… Do you think they’re searching for us?”

And if that isn’t depressing. Keith is really bad at this, but Shiro isn’t here and he’s the only one currently not affected by the loss of his family -because he didn’t have one on earth, and because his is here now. So he tries to cheer them up like Shiro would, tells them they’ll just defeat Zarkon and the Galra empire, save the universe and go home to tell their families that they don’t _have_ to search for them anymore, and he thinks it at least helps a little.

But it makes him think of _afterwards_ for the first time, too. Of course they’re going to defeat the Empire, that’s out of question; otherwise there simply is no future. But what will happen once they’ve done that? Everybody will go back to earth, to their homes, of course. Only that Keith’s home -if you want to call his shack that- is very empty, and very cold. The others will go back to their families, but Keith’s family is here. Could he just stay with them? Would that mean never seeing Shiro and the others again? He couldn’t do that. Could he take the Galra with him? He doesn’t even know if that would be okay with them. Not to speak about how humans in general are not very accepting of anything new and different, much less actual aliens.

There doesn’t seem to be a solution to that problem, and no matter what he told the others, they’re not even _close_ to defeating Zarkon and the Empire, so he lets it go for now, represses the mere thought of it, and if he’s a little more tactile during pack time, the others either don’t notice, or, which is more likely, get that he doesn’t want to talk about it. But the feeling of having to choose sometime stays, and it simmers, unnoticed.

A few weeks later there is a distress call, not from anybody, but from other Blades of Marmora. They need help, and they need a lot of it, or rather, they need their leader -or leaders; Keith thinks that Kolivan might be the leader, but the others are probably his generals or something. Kolivan has a very long video call with them and when he comes back from that he’s looking very grim. Apparently it’s not something Voltron couldn’t help with, but all of them are needed -all of the Galra. All of them, except Keith; he needs to stay behind in case Voltron is needed somewhere else. He doesn’t like it one bit, and he doesn’t think the others like it, either. The longest he’s been separated from them has been about three days, but this is going to take at least five. It’s going to suck.

But he lets them go anyway, because he’s not going to make a fuss or throw a temper tantrum like a little kid. They promise to be as quick as they can and that’s that. They’re gone. Keith sleeps in their nest at night, which is way too big for only one person but smells like pack, so that’s good. For the first three days, it’s okay. The fourth is strained, and he can’t wait for them to come back. On the fith day they call to tell them that it’s going to take longer than anticipated, and Keith barely manages to bite back the whine at the news. After that he looses his sence of time a little. He knows the others probably notice that something isn’t right, but he can’t hide it any better.

It might be the seventh night without his pack when Keith dreams.

_He_ _’_ _s back at that place. He_ _’_ _s gone through a lot of foster homes during the years, most of them pretty nice people, but Keith has understood early on that he_ _’_ _s not going to stay anywhere for long, so there_ _’_ _s no reason to get attached to anybody. He knows that they think he_ _’_ _s weird, sometimes, that he understands too much for a little kid, and that he just does weird things, and sooner or later there comes the point where they can_ _’_ _t deal with it anymore._

_This place is not one of the nice ones. It_ _’_ _s the worst one he_ _’_ _s ever been, actually. Keith is ten, and the place is packed with children, little four-year-olds up to teenagers. He understands enough to know that foster parents get money for taking care of them, and these two, he doesn_ _’_ _t even know their names, everybody has to call them Ma and Pa, have taken in_ a lot _of children. So they_ _’_ _re paid a lot, but they spend most of that money on themselves. Oh, they_ _’_ _re perfect during check-ups, and the children play along, because most of them are scared and the rest wants to stay in Ma and Pa_ _’_ _s good books._

_But as soon as they_ _’_ _re alone it_ _’_ _s best to just not be noticed by the adults. That_ _’_ _s the best way not to be hit, too, especially if you stay outside if you can. Keith didn_ _’_ _t want to play along, and he_ _’_ _s a trouble maker, so they locked him up in the cabinet where they keep the cleaning utensils. If he makes noise during the check-up, they_ _’_ _ve promised him a special punishment, and he_ _’_ _s not stupid, so he'll_ _stay quiet. But he can_ _’_ _t help a little sound escaping him; one of those that are really weird and happen from time to time. He just hopes nobody heard. But he_ _’_ _s never that lucky, and the lady from the Child Services of all people notices._

_They get him out of the cabinet and Ma and Pa play it down, say that he_ _’_ _s hiding in there sometimes and somebody must_ _’_ _ve locked the door without noticing so the little children don_ _’_ _t get to the cleaning utensils. They fuss over him a little, pretend to, but he can see in their eyes that he_ _’_ _s in for that special punishment now. And it_ _’_ _s going to hurt._

Keith wakes with a start, his heart racing, palms sweaty -his shirt is wet and his hair is plastered to his forehead. He makes a little whining sound, searching for his pack, their warmth, but they’re not here, and in his panic he doesn’t remember that they’re away, and all that comes to his mind is: Abandoned. Again. _They would never do that,_ a little voice in the back of his head tries to tell him; but if they wouldn’t do that, then where are they?

His instincts take over from there, completely for the first time. He’s awake but not in control; the world strangely blurred, and his Galra half decides to go search for his pack -it’s the only thing he can think of right now. His number one priority. He can’t find them. He calls for them, but for the first time nobody answers. So they did abandon him, after all? They have to. Why else would they not answer? At that realization he calls out for a last time, louder than before, and not really calling for them anymore but rather bewailing his loss. His pack doesn’t want him anymore. He’s not good enough, not a real kit, so he’s been abandoned.

“Keith?” Somebody is coming closer. Whoever it is is just as blurred as the rest of the world, but he thinks he knows that voice. “Keith are you alright? Are you… crying?” Shiro, his mind finally supplies. Shiro is kind of pack. He’s answered. The next moment Keith is in his arms, hugging him tight. Shiro is surprised, tenses for a second, but then relaxes and hugs him back.

“Hey,” he says, “it’s alright… What happened?” Keith can only whine right now, with his Galra half and instincts in control human language is not an option. That doesn’t help Shiro much, and it makes everything more complicated, but in the end he gets it. “Okay,” he says. “Okay, we’re just gonna call Kolivan. He’ll know what to do…” So they end up on the bridge, in front of the big monitor, video calling Kolivan in the middle of the night; this is an emergency, though, so it’s okay.

The older Galra looks surprised. “What’s the matter?” he asks. Keith whines pitifully again, trying one more time to call out to him, and is finally answered. Kolivan rumbles reassuringly, takes in Keith and looks at Shiro. “What _happened_?” he growls.

“I don’t know, I found him like that and he won’t talk,” Shiro replies, helplessly. In that moment Antok comes into the picture, and his eyes widen.

“I _knew_ we shouldn’t have all left!” He swears. “I knew something was bothering him to begin with, and we’ve been gone for far too long!”

One after the other, all members of Keith’s pack notice what’s happening and come to sit in front of the camera.

“His instincts have taken over,” Ulaz states, calmly. “Something must have happened to trigger this.”

“ _Something_ ,” Antok growls again. “We’ve been gone for far too long, that’s what. That’s been hard on us, and he’s been on his own! I’m coming back.” The last sentence carries a finality nobody objects to.

Kolivan nods, giving his approval. “You’ve been what’s closest to pack for him back on earth, haven’t you?” he asks Shiro. The black paladin can only nod.

“I guess…”

“Good. I need you to stay with him until Antok arrives. I don’t like it, but it’s best if you get him back into the nest. Just stay with him.”

“I can do that,” Shiro replies honestly, and very seriously. He’s never seen Keith like this. They end the call and he somehow manages to move him back into the Galras’ room; he’s never been here but he sees what Kolivan meant when he was talking about the nest. It’s an actual nest of pillows and blankets, big enough for several people. He keeps talking to Keith, stays with him for the next few hours, and Keith still doesn’t talk when Antok arrives, but he’s calmed down. The Galra looks dishevelled, as if he didn’t waste another second after that call. Shiro leaves them alone.

Antok rumbles, as soon as he sees Keith, and Keith can’t believe that he’s back. He perks up, calls out quietly, and this time his call is answered and he’s pulled against a strong, warm chest. Keith clings to him for a while before his instincts are satisfied. He’s a little terrified at Shiro having seen him like this, but at least it was only Shiro and he knows the older paladin is not going to bring this up ever again. Apart from that, the relief at having back at least a part of his pack is the only thing he cares about right now.

“I really thought you guys had abandoned me,” he mutters, ashamed.

Antok growls again, nuzzles that point behind his ear. “Never.” Keith likes the finality of that. There’s silence, then Antok asks, “What made you think that?”

“A dream,” Keith replies, tired now. “Just a dream. But you guys weren’t here when I woke and I kinda panicked,” he admits, embarrassed.

A hum. “I see…”

“Hey Antok?” the young paladin asks a while later.

“Hm?”

“Are the others coming back, too?”

“Soon, youngling.”

Keith doesn’t know much after that. He probably just falls asleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and Feedback always appreciated!~ I love you all and I love Keith, I swear, even though I'm so mean to him (only to make it better in the end, though)


End file.
